Monday, April 30, 2007

at least,


he can't ever call me




reserve again.

angela posted this at 21:06 [comment]

***

Saturday, April 28, 2007

well so today spent it out studying. somehow even though we didnt fool around, i dont think i accomplished much. i cant do poisson.
and i found out today i cannot do complex 13b anymore.
!
:o
):
anyway i am ughed. will continue with econs later on. shall relax a bit now.
i have an urgent plea.

PLEASE don't say/do anything that will put ideas into my little brother's highly impressionable mind if you see him and me on tuesday. PLEASE i am begging.
to those whom this especially applies to eg. james/keefe
PLEASE OK

thanks :D

angela posted this at 20:41 [comment]

***

Friday, April 27, 2007

i havent been able to shout these few days. i think the inflamed throat has got to do with it.
i am POSITIVELY sick of the parents not giving me credit for what i'm doing and what im trying to do.
every damned day they pester me in this 'now-no-softball-you-out-there-playing-whole-day-thats-why-come-home-so-late-right?' way.

wtf buay tahan

yah now there's no softball.

SO ?!

to complete tmr:
1. summarize aims and issues
2. ditto fiscal
3. ditto monetary
4. tut 18a plz for goodness sakes finish it UGH
5. F need to study for chem focus test. F!
6. S2 poisson

can?

ok pls try very hard.

speaking of chem focus test. to hell with the weather. i had to plead for me to take the makeup test on monday because of today's match. and now i cannot possibly get out of this shit test. damn.

hungry!

angela posted this at 23:08 [comment]

***

Thursday, April 26, 2007

people keep coming up to me to say how chio some of my good friends are.
lol.
maybe i should, in the spirit of entrepreneurship, commercialize on their ... hotness value.
let me explain.
for one, i could sell handphone numbers to the highest bidder. prices depend on say, availability of the girl etc.
or sell photos.



just kidding! i wouldnt sell my friends for money.. TEMPTING though it is. haii. jsut go tell the girl herself la tell me for what. as if i dont know?



i wonder if you know how much i

angela posted this at 18:34 [comment]

***

Monday, April 23, 2007

this is my 555th post. i have had this blog for a really long time.
oki have officially been coughing for 10 days. and there's hardly any phlegm i just keep choking on my breath. -.- sounds damn lame. today i think the whole library heard me.
and the mother is seriously something wrong. every little bit of thing, yell. its like her motto is: yell first, talk later.
wth. and whenever i talk to her she doesnt respond. so when i ask politely mummy did you hear me? and i swear i am being polite. then she goes YA LA YA LA I HEARD YOU
wth.

on another note. i am feeling this weird.. empty space. like everytime i see anyone going off for training my heart pain. when i see softballers going off for trng my heart Pain. and studying in the library sucks. i always need to nap first because the afternoon is a mother sleepy time of day for me.

and i just can't stop thinking about it/you/they/her/him.
i wish everyone would just shut the hell up. now see here it dont apply to any of you.
am i wrong to say that your insistence on my problem with asthma and occasional fits of flu/cough and insistence on supplements and your scolding me everytime i fall a bit sick -- does not help at all? and in fact makes me feel like an invalid? i know i'm fine and you are not helping. and then, if i am sooo sick, if my problem is sooo serious, then you dont come to the doctor with me? logic?

Every Now And Then - Diamond Rio

Every now and then
soft as breath upon my skin
I feel you come back again
And it’s like you haven’t been gone a moment from my side,
Like the tears were never cried,
Like the hands of time were pulling you and me.

And with all my heart I’m sure we’re closer than we ever were,
I don’t have to hear or see I’ve got all the proof I need.
There are more than angels watching over me

I believe
Oh I believe

Now when you die and life goes on,
It doesn’t end here
When you’re gone every soul has found a flight
It never ends if I’m right.

Our love can even reach across eternity

I believe
Oh I believe

Forever you’re a part of me,
Forever in the heart of me,
I will hold you even longer if I can.
Oh the people, who don’t see the most,
Say that I believe in ghosts.
If that makes me crazy then I am

Cuz I believe
Oh I believe

There are more than angels watching over me

I believe
Oh I believe

Every now and then soft as breath upon my skin,
I feel you come back again
And I believe

this 555th post, sure is conflicting.

angela posted this at 22:52 [comment]

***

Sunday, April 22, 2007

i shampooed my hair three times but i can still smell remnants of smoke.
ugh i didnt like the smoke.
but cheng! we had fun! esp watching you.. uh. yeah haha.
---------------
its late. but the hair has to dry so i am here.
---------------
i have decided.
future boyfriend/husband must :
1. not smoke
2. not drink too much [a little on occasion is fine]
3. preferably tall. [hee]
4. not swear like nobody's business
-----------------
shall go collegeboard now

angela posted this at 02:34 [comment]

***

Saturday, April 21, 2007

hm. i will remember that walking home at night is very scary. along the way i saw this couple on a bench at the playground. the girl was i think, crying into the guy's lap. it reminded me of one of those touchy moments frequently shown in movies.
then slightly further on, i saw another couple. males. i fairly fled. not that they were gay or anything, but all of a sudden i panicked ya and brisk walked up the hill.
i got home in a nice sweat.
-------------
recently i took a look at zacky. apart from the nose that's dropping off and the extremely faded colour he seems to have shrunk alot. quite likey he's smaller than he was 14 years ago, but in my mind i remembered him to be much bigger than he is now. and this was quite a sad thought. does that mean zacky has gotten less important to me? ]:
then i saw that my room was actually pretty big. actually its not, the breadth is enough to put my study table and shelf about.. 2.5 feet wide. and the length has my bed, and another of those shelves at the foot of my bed. actually i have never measured my room. but at the time i got it, i thought it was super small. its the smallest room in this house anw.

anyway. i spent a total of 6 hours on chem today. congratulate me pls.

]:


angela posted this at 00:50 [comment]

***

Wednesday, April 18, 2007

there is something in me
that longs to get muddy again
and bruised shins
swollen fingers on my left hand
and feel the arm ache
damn, even end at 8pm again!

haha oh puhleeze.


you can take back all your lies
and i will keep my secrets

thanks.



angela posted this at 00:09 [comment]

***

Tuesday, April 17, 2007

amazing how many synonyms? acronyms? err i dunnowhat-nym. that kids can come up with

wth wtf wts lol mofo kns knn

basically all the bad words. but there are non-bad ones [with non-bad not being good; like S2 sth about not decreasing doesnt mean increasing -.-] like

ofc ty np btw

i am needlessly expanding brain cell energy.

angela posted this at 23:57 [comment]

***

Monday, April 16, 2007

ac is quite lonely.
everyday
her friends leave for training;
ac is left alone in the library.

study la you ass!

angela posted this at 22:37 [comment]

***

Sunday, April 15, 2007

Home - Dishwalla

I'm so sick and tired
of all these things
that drag me down
I've got no where to go
they say that life is in these hands
you give everything
you give yourself away you give
and still you choke
and find yourself running for the door

come and take me
home
lead me to your door
take me where you are
lead me to your door
at least just for a while

its some kind of life
forever days
we're in the cold
unfamiliar way
so take this fear
and fade it out
it won't make me sad
cause I get sentimental lord
in other ways
and I don't want to let me down here anymore

so come and take me home
lead me to your door
take me where you are
lead me to your door
and let me injust let me in
and let me leave
just let me leave this world
come on now let me leave this world
at least just for a while


at least just for a while

angela posted this at 21:55 [comment]

***

Saturday, April 14, 2007

i should have known you longer



i decided. after A's im going on a holiday.

start saving man.


further plans:
1. chemistry [heart and soul pls, now that softball is no more]
2. math [ditto above]
3. econs [ditto avove]
4. geog [ ditto above]
5. read many many gp essays and AQ wth. [ditto above]


also need to decide what to do in uni!
business?

angela posted this at 22:57 [comment]

***

Friday, April 13, 2007

the shoebag stares me in the face
shinguards on the sock drawer i see every morning when i leave for school and evening when i get home
what am i supposed to do with all these memories?
i've hidden both raffles caps already, only because it hurt to look at them.
i should have left after resh and alvin left today.
the whoosh was too much

maybe you think im pissed, but actually im not. not over the decision, rather over the behavior. which i found almost ridiculous, were it not so revolting.

i'll just take everything with a cartload of salt yea

i dont really want to talk to you anymore because because.
just because.

funny thing is when i'm with friends everything is pretty ok
but the moment i have a moment to myself
woah. why, brain, why!
so many things to be thankful for, yet i keep harping on this. the irrationality of it all takes over completely.
on one hand
i loved it; i love it. i love the people, but still i've wasted a HELL lot of time. is this sensible? i don't know. maybe i should have taken daddy's advice and quit immediately after chiangmai. haha.
the worst part of it all, is that i dont understand. is it a conscious decision to deny the knowledge of it? or a subconscious one. or possibly it is a pure unadulterated belief in myself.
):

and to

resh xh ruoq jem moni 7b girlfriends anna heng xueting em james weehao ianchew jiayuan cz shouyee aston

<3


one of my greatest dreams was to be good enough in softball to be first 9 always, while achieving good grades at the same time. looks like i didnt work hard enough? or it was God's design?
but its through adversity that our faith is strengthened, hope renewed, and love deepened.


still, possibly nothing has hurt more

angela posted this at 22:42 [comment]

***

All at once,
I started counting teardrops and at least a million fell
My eyes began to swell,
And all my dreams were shattered all at once

Wish that I could cry
Fall upon my knees
Find a way to lie

All at once,
I'm drifting on a lonely sea
Holding on to memories
And it hurts me more than you know
So much more than it shows

Where do broken hearts go
Can they find their way home
Back to the open arms
Of a love thats waiting there

And no matter how I try
You're always on my mind

I'm every woman
I'm every woman

I wanna run to you
Wont you hold me in your arms
And keep me safe from harm

Do you ever think about me?
Do you ever cry yourself to sleep?
I can't believe I'm acting like this
I know its crazy

Do you ever ask about me?
Do your friends still tell you what to do?
Do you wish it was me calling you?
Is everything ok?

I'll be waiting for you
Here inside my heart
I'm the one who wants to love you more

I said who's that girl there?
I wonder what went wrong

Although you're trying not to listen
Avert your eyes and starin' at the ground
She makes a subtle proposition
I'm sorry love I'll have to turn you down

Cause he's a scumbag, don't you know
I said he's a scumbag, don't you know!

So don't surrender, cos you can win



blog spam.
sorry if i offend.
but, this is mine.

angela posted this at 01:29 [comment]

***

of all the shit!

ya so after enduring all this shit
from c0ach
from parents
from teachers
ending at 8
being so shagged and falling asleep on my floor
and benching
and injuries
and basically wasting ALOT of time this 5+ years,

whee! free!

i've so much time now, dont know what to do with it.
not literally i mean.
time now for studies.
on the up side, now i've time to play with my little brother
and watch tv
and chat on msn
and talk on the phone
and go ntuc with my ma
and spend time in the school lib reading geographica, tintin, calvin and hobbes, agatha christie, national geographic, readers digest ...

but of course i love my friends.
if anything else, s0ftball has given me harder thigh muscles than my brother.
and also a bigger right arm than my left -.-
a very obvious fbt tanline
a slightly swollen right middle finger cos it never healed properly
calluses [calli?] on both big toes cos of boots
a phobia of big balls
oh. at least i can catch small things with my left hand!

maslow's hierachy of needs; self actualization tops the list.

sad --> pissed --> sad --> heck la --> sad --> f.it --> sad

here we go.
-----------------------
on another note, i am quite sad.
people going to ns tmr!
-----------------------

nobody ever made me feel this way - PCD: stickwityou [lol what bad spelling]

angela posted this at 00:57 [comment]

***

boy it hurts

angela posted this at 00:16 [comment]

***

Thursday, April 12, 2007

answer in one word.

1. Where is your cell phone? room
2. Describe your boyfriend/girlfriend? nil
3. Your hair? frizzzzzy
4. Your mother? lovely.
5. Your father? different
6. Your favourite item? zacky
7. Your dream last night? weird
8. Your favourite drink? juices
9. Your dream car? jaguar
10. The room you are in? common
11. Your ex? NA.
12. Your fear? hopelessness.
13. What do you want to be in 10 years? happy
14. Who did you hang out with last night? myself
15. What you're not? tall
19. The last thing you did? cry
20. What are you wearing? harley d
22. Your favourite book? dunno
23. The last thing you ate? dunno
24. Your life? shitty.
25. Your mood? awful
26. Your friends? great
27. What are you thinking about right now? softball
28. Your car? NA
29. What are you doing at the moment? blogging
30. Your summer? perpetual
31. Your relationship status? single
32. What is on your TV? clock
33. When is the last time you laughed? dunno
34. Last time you cried? just
35. School? rj.

forgetforget

angela posted this at 23:55 [comment]

***

Wednesday, April 11, 2007

also, to
but i still cannot believe
ruoq, xh my pinkie friend, resh, jem, moni.
nor get over
love you all to the ends of the earth.
and not forgetting all the calls, smses and are-you-alrights [:
oh well it'll come sooner or later
that sounds.. cheesy doesnt even begin to describe it, but there it is.
sometimes its painful at others its pissing
i have a cheesy nature that surfaces every now and then.

i think i've lost a bit of my appetite

All At Once - Whitney Houston

All at once,
I finally took a moment and I'm realizing that
Your not coming back
And it finally hit me all at once
All at once,
I started counting teardrops and at least a million fell
My eyes began to swell,
And all my dreams were shattered all at once

Chorus:
Ever since I met you
You're the only love I've known
And I can't forget you
Though I must face it all alone
All at once, I'm drifting on a lonely sea
Wishing you'd come back to me
And thats all that matters now
All at once, I' m drifting on a lonely sea
Holding on to memories
And it hurts me more than you know
So much more than it shows
All at once

All at once,
I looked around and found that you were with another love
In someone elses arms,
And all my dreams were shattered, all at once
All at once
The smile that used to greet me brightened someone else's day
She took your smile away
And left me with just memories, all at once

Chorus

angela posted this at 21:11 [comment]

***

Tuesday, April 10, 2007

i just want to thank you,
Aston.

truly!








This is the day that the Lord has made
I will rejoice and be glad in it
Rejoice! Rejoice!

angela posted this at 01:18 [comment]

***

Saturday, April 07, 2007

so (do) you prefer mediocrity?
this middle child syndrome has got to go!

angela posted this at 22:19 [comment]

***

Thursday, April 05, 2007

this few days have been reasonably slack, by my standards. or rather, affordably slack.
i decided that it was time to take some time off. instead of like rushing from endless pile of crap to endless pile of crap, one should yeah. take time off to recharge.
i borrowed agatha christie's complete complilation of hercule poirot's short stories from the sch lib. yay i intend to indulge tonight/early tmr morning.
that is a very nice, welcome thought.
and then ok need to make plans for this weekend.

friday [Good Friday!]
morning: read in bed a while
then go jogging while watching dvd
breakfast
-------
tut 13b that irritating 12c will die tmr
tut s1, as much as possible.
chem 16, 17, start 18. [IN THAT ORDER YOU HEAR!]
-------
service!
-------
continue chem.
-------
poirot!

sat:
wake up late, go tuition.
resume chem.
READ: issues aims policies, fiscal policy, monetary policy.

ok will continue planning later.

angela posted this at 23:10 [comment]

***